"Yes, we won! Now Coach Strong can't suspend any of us!"
"Guys, c'mon, I'm just trying to get my Heisman. Could you make a little room here. Why do you even care? All Butch Jones cares about is his high-collared fleece jackets!"
"Aw c'mon guys, ya can't lose this one! My dad's gonna slobber all over me if we lose!" Yes, this is Skip Holtz, Lou's son. He's obviously too fat to have any wrinkly jowls of his own.
Man, why couldn't the Gamecocks play THIS Vanderbilt?
"A trophy? Do we have a rivalry with Arkansas?"
"Nah, it's just a Jerry Jones thing. He gives out these BS trophies to anyone who'll play here. It's just to remind the Cowboys of how much they suck, like to motivate them."
"Does it work?"
"They're the Cowboys, you tell me."
"What, you jealous, ref? Keep peepin' at my man and I'll tackle you harder than any NCAA sanction could!"
It appears the Terrapin mascot just became self-aware. That's a look of "oh god, I'm a giant turtle, what have I done with my life?"
"Hey, can one of you get the light? This guy just gave me a concussion and this turf feels really comfy right now."
"Maybe if I keep doing the Pledge of Allegiance, they won't start the game. They wouldn't make a patriotic guy like me take a beating from Notre Dame! Then again, they made a patriotic guy like me coach Syracuse. F*** it, I'm getting fired anyways."
"...and then she took out her huge boobies, that were all the way out to here! So I tried to touch 'em, but then some jerk threw me out of the place. I don't know why they even bother strippin'!"