Tater Lane

By Rixon Lane

Tater Lane had a rough weekend, but he has somehow rallied to bring his unique brand of analysis into your lives.

 

In honor of Deshuan, I considered not using the letters “ACL” or “LCL” in this column. Then, I quiky reized tht this woud probby be unredbe if I deided to do tht.

Not gonna lie, I blacked out when Watson came out of the game and didn’t wake up until it was over. Just wish Stoudt hadn’t done the same.

Two things you never want to see in the negatives: bank accounts and passer ratings.

Georgia Tech’s full of engineers, so it’s not out of the realm of possibility that they put a magnet in the football that was designed to make it fly towards Tech players. In fact, that’s probably what happened. In fact, why isn’t ESPN investigating this? #SECbias

Almost certain I saw Chad Kelly’s face on my burnt piece of toast this morning. My psychiatrist says that’s “disturbing” and “grounds for further evaluation,” but she doesn’t even watch football.

It’s been roughly 30 hours and Dylan Thompson still hasn’t crossed the goal line yet.  

Spurrier can’t stop taking shots at Clemson. Asking about scores and injury reports. Arrogant jerk.

It really says something about just how detestable your football program is when you are able to unite the entire country behind the Miami Hurricanes.

In honor of his offensive philosophy, Will Muschamp’s pink slip was delivered via carrier tortoise.